THE IMPORTANCE OF PARENT PREPARATION BEFORE THE BEGIN OF THEIR ADOPTION JOURNEY
One of the reasons parent preparation for adoption was never given importance in our country was probably because it was mostly infants going into waiting families. Today, adoption is not about infants only. There are older children who are getting adopted and some of these children might have experienced or witnessed physical, sexual and verbal abuse or physical and emotional neglect, they could have witnessed their mother being abused or any other reason.
Adoption should not be entered into, until one is fully prepared to be a family to a child and it is not necessary that both, husband & wife feel the same way about adoption. But, as prospective parents, one needs to look into the readiness to give the adopted child endless amount of unconditional love and support for a lifetime. The adopted child’s past, religion, linguistic background and questions and concerns are sure to come up over the course of the lifetime together, acceptance of these responsibilities and ensuring a loving Home and an encouraging family is the key to a lifelong healthy journey of adoption. While all families are not created equally, all children are and have similar wants and needs.
If one is already a parent, one needs to consider how adoption will impact their biological child. The decision certainly will be the parents’ and not theirs, but hearing them and allowing participation is important. Another important factor is to understand the needs of an adopted child by looking into one’s own support system —family or friends who will be there for the parent/s and back their adoption decision and who will embrace the child the same way they would a biological child.
All adoptions journeys are not the same, neither are the rules, requirements, and restrictions that go along with the various processes. It is important to learn about the adoption processes and whether one is eligible to adopt an infant or an older child or a child with special needs or a sibling group. An Adoption Counsellor can help prospective parents to understand & help navigate which, otherwise can be confusing and time consuming. An informed parent is a better parent, in other words.
This is my suggestion to prospective families –
Adoption creates permanent families and brings added special circumstances and needs for the parent and the child. It shall help prospective adoptive parents to surround themselves with people who are on a similar journey of adoption. Another benefit from finding friends is that the children will also have a circle of families that look like theirs to grow up. The challenges and demands of raising a child have only increased and having a friend who is walking the same journey will make all the difference when things get tough.
Radha Nagesh
Adoption Counsellor
This article originally appeared in http://www.thewonderwomenworld.com/are-you-ready/
