Sometimes, we unintentionally communicate negative thoughts that could be detrimental to the relationship you have with the person. Therefore, being mindful of the kind of language we use becomes imperative for a healthy relationship.
Here is an exhaustive list that we should NOT say to the Adoptees
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You are special because you are adopted
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You were chosen
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Your birth mother loved you so much that she gave you up
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You are lucky
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It doesn’t matter
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You shouldn’t be sad
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You should be careful what you ask for…you might get it
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By finding her, you are invading her life
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Why are you interested in someone who doesn’t want you
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Ever since you have started searching, you have become obsessed
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…But your adoptive parents loved you so much
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…But you are hurting your adoptive parents
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You are being ungrateful
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You have no respect for your adoptive parents
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Get over it!
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If she loved you, she wouldn’t have given you away
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You are being over sensitive
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Forget and get on with your life
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Why would you want to find her
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You have no right to disturb her life
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You are being selfish and disrespectful
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Oh…you’re one of them
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You should respect her privacy
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But you don’t look adopted
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Well, maybe that was the way it was meant to be
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If she didn’t want you then, why would would she want you know? You will get rejected.
Source: Mrs. Saras Bhaskar
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Currently pursuing her PhD at the University of Madras, Chennai.
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As a research scholar was associated with University of Utrecht, Nederland
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Master of Art in Human Services, Counseling & HRM, St. Edwards University, Austin Texas
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Master of Arts in Applied Psychology, SIET College for Women, Chennai Tamil
To get in touch with Mrs. Saras Bhaskar, visit https://padme.in/supportcounselling/
